Life is about relationships. Relationship is the state of being connected—to God, people and the world. One God-given relationship that’s important is between parents and children. As parents, we have the opportunity to lovingly connect with our children and ultimately point them to Christ. One thing I remember doing as a parent was figuring out ways to “tie strings” to my children’s hearts—to make connections. A string is a single thread, but when many strings have been tied together over time, the connection is strong. One way we can “tie strings” is by talking with our children and asking thoughtful questions. Asking questions and listening carefully (not lecturing) will help us connect and understand what’s happening in our child’s life and heart. It also communicates to kids that we care. Learning to ask good questions is a practiced skill, so ask the Lord what questions would be meaningful. Good questions serve as a springboard to learn about our children and encourage them to think about important life issues.
Here are a handful of questions I came across in a book entitled, Caring for the Souls of Children.
1. What’s the best thing in your life? What’s the hardest?
2. Who are some of your favorite people? Why? What do you enjoy doing together?
3. Do you ever ask God for help? If so, what happened? If not, how do you think he would’ve responded if you had asked?
4. Who’s the hardest person in your life to be around? What do you do when that person’s there?
5. Do people ever make fun of you?
Learning what’s going on in a child’s heart is crucial because Proverbs 4:23 reminds us that from the heart flow the springs of life. So don’t wait, take the time to connect!
~~ Shannon Gray