Intergenerational Friendships

Over the course of the first few weeks of this year I found myself officiating a wedding, conducting a funeral, and leading a baby dedication. Indeed, the opportunity to walk alongside others in various seasons of life is one of the great privileges of pastoral ministry. It is also a reminder that part of the intended diversity of God’s people is age. Some of us are younger, some of us are older, some of us are in-between (I’ll let you figure out where each of those begins and ends). And this is good!

In Psalm 145:4 we hear the command that “one generation shall commend your works to another, and shall declare your mighty acts.” There is an expectation here that God’s people will consist of multiple generations, and that the older generation is responsible for passing along God’s truths to the next generation. We have a number of these intergenerational relationship examples in the Bible, from Eli and Samuel to Elijah and Elisha to Naomi and Ruth to Paul and Timothy, and so we see that this is an enduring value that the Lord desires to characterize his people in any setting at any time.

Despite the value of intergenerational relationships, they can also present challenges. We might struggle to find common topics of conversation, or find that we have different priorities or interests, or even have different preferences or expectations about what “community” looks like. For these reasons and a plethora of others, many may find it easier to simply engage relationships with those who are in their same season of life. But here is where we must remember that an important component of true biblical community is that we pursue relationships with those we typically would not pursue.

The basis of our relationships should not simply fall along the lines of natural connections. Rather, what connects followers of Christ, regardless of age, is our common need for Christ. We are all different ages, but we are all unified in our dependence upon Christ. Older and younger can teach each other and learn from each other in a number of ways, and when we are willing to push through some of the challenges of intergenerational relationships, we may find that they not only become some of our most cherished relationships but also a powerful witness to the world of unity that is only possible through Christ.

Action Point: identify someone who is not your age that you can begin to get to know better!

Ben

 

Check out the following articles for further thoughts on cultivating biblically-based friendships:

The Unique Witness of Unlikely Friendships

Gray Hair and a Righteous Life

100 Questions to Fuel Mentoring Relationships

Love through the Awkward

Beware of Friendship Idealism